Mu buzima bwacu hazamo n’ubuzima bujyanye n’imyororokere. Ubu buzima ahanini bushingira ku mibonano mpuzabitsina, igikorwa kiba kireba impande zombi ni ukuvuga umugabo n’umugore.
Nyamara usanga abagore bamwe bavuga ko batajya baryoherwa n’iyo mibonano, ugasanga umugore arinze abyara gatatu atazi kurangiza ibyo ari byo, ndetse anakora imibonano kuko umugabo abimusabye gusa.
Ibi si ibintu byiza kuko imibonano ni igikorwa gihuza abantu babiri kandi bose baba bagomba kunezezwa no kuryoherwa n’iyo mibonano.
Hano rero twaguteguriye impamvu zinyuranye zitera kutaryoherwa n’imibonano, ndetse turasoza turebera hamwe uburyo wabikosora noneho ukarushaho kwishimira iki gikorwa.
Impamvu 7 zitera kutaryoherwa n’imibonano
1.Ntabwo witeguye
Kugirango unezezwe unaryoherwe n’imibonano bisaba ko uba witeguye haba ku mubiri, mu mutwe, ndetse no mu byiyumviro. Ubusanzwe iyo umugore yiteguye gukora imibonano mu gitsina no mu mabere hiyongeramo amaraso, bikamutera kumva ubushake bwiyongereye ndetse we ubwe akaba yanakwisabira ko mukora imibonano.
Usanga rero abagore bamwe babikora batateguwe cyangwa batiteguye, bikaba bishobora no kubatera gukomereka kuko mu gitsina nta bubobere buhagije buba burimo.
Ibi rero kubikosora bireba umugabo n’umugore. Mbere yo gukora imibonano bakabanza kwitegura bihagije bakoresheje gukorakorana, kuganira utugambo turyoshye, kuba badafite ikibatandukanya muri iyo minsi ndetse nta kibabangamiye ako kanya.
2.Uri kwishinja
Ibi ahanini bireba abakora imibonano batarashyingirwa uretse ko binareba abagore bamwe. Niba ugiye gukora imibonano muri wowe wishinja ko ari icyaha ukoze, wishinja ko uri guhemuka, gukosa se, cyangwa se hari ikosa wakoze utarasabira imbabazi, ntabwo uzaryoherwa. Niba uzi ko uri guca inyuma uwo mwashakanye, nayo izaba impamvu ituma utaryoherwa.
Kugirango ibi rero ubikosore biragusaba kubanza kumva ko niba wafashe umwanzuro wo gukora imibonano, utari ukwiye kugira ibindi wibaza ku ruhande. Niba koko wumva ko ukwiye kutabikora, ni byiza kubireka aho kubikora utabyishimiye.
3.Nturi kwiyumvamo uwo mubikorana
Ibi hari igihe ushobora kutabyiyumvisha ariko ushobora kuba wemeye gukora imibonano atari uko ubishaka cyangwa witeguye ahubwo ari ukubera indi mpamvu. Ushobora kubikora kubera inyungu ubikuramo, ushobora kuba warikuyemo uwo muntu ariko yagusaba ugapfa kumuha byo kubura uko ugira.
Ushobora no kuba wari witeguye ariko yakuramo ugasanga wenda ntiyogoshe insya, ugasanga se wenda ntasiramuye (ari ubwa mbere muhuye), cyangwa se afite igitsina kitangana uko ushaka (gito cyangwa kinini).
Mushobora no kuba mwarakaranyije ariko mutariyunga, nayo yaba impamvu.
Ibi kubikosora rero bigusaba kujya gukora imibonano, wumva ko ari ibyishimo bya mwembi kandi ukaba wiyumvamo koko uwo mugiye kuyikorana. Iyo umwiyumvamo niyo agusomye gusa uhita ubishaka, kandi kubishaka bikurikirwa no kuryoherwa.
4.Ntiwishimiye uko uri
Muri iyi minsi kubera iterambere n’ikoranabuhanga hari igihe abantu bakundana batarabonana amaso ku maso, nuko bagahura biteguye no gukora imibonano. Hari igihe uba waramuhaye udufoto duhanaguye neza ndetse twacyeshejwe nyamara atari ko usa neza. Nuko mwahura ukumva muri wowe ntiwisanzuye kuko amafoto yakubeshye. Si ibyo gusa ushobora no kuba ufite umugabo yaragiye kure nuko yaza agasanga wenda warabyibushye cyane cyangwa warananutse birenze uko yagusize nuko ukumva ntiwisanzuye kuko wahindutse. Cyangwa se ukaba utwite ukumva biragutera ipfunwe uko ungana ku buryo mu buriri wumva utisanzuye
Umuti nta wundi ni ukwiyakira no kwirinda gukoresha amafoto akugira ukundi utari. Ibi bituma wishimira uko uri, waba uteye nabi cyangwa ukundi bikakunyura
5.Ufite stress
Nubwo ubusanzwe gukora imibonano ukarangiza birwanya stress ariko nanone kuyikora ufite stress nyinshi bishobora gutuma utaryoherwa. Ibibazo ku kazi, mu rugo se, umwana urwaye cyangwa udahari, kubura akazi cyangwa kwirukanwa, n’ibindi byinshi biri mu bitera stress. Ibi nkuko twabibonye ku ngingo ya mbere bituma ubikora byo kubura uko ugira, kuko mu mutwe ntuba witeguye. Niyo mpamvu ari byiza kubanza kwikuramo ibitekerezo bindi ugakora imibonano utuje kandi witeguye
6.Ufite uburwayi
Niba ibi byose tuvuze haruguru habuzemo na kimwe kigutera kutaryoherwa n’imibonano bivuzeko hari uburwayi runaka ufite. Gusa nanone mu burwayi busanzwe ushobora kutaryoherwa ariko bwakira ukaryoherwa. Ariko niba nta burwayi ufite uzi, hari ikibazo cyane cyane mu mikorere y’imisemburo yawe. Akenshi iyo utwite, wonsa cyangwa uri hafi gucura usanga imisemburo ya estrogen na testosterone ihindagurika nuko bikagira ingaruka mu kugira ubushake bw’imibonano. Iyo rero utari muri ibi bihe, bikakubaho, ni byiza kwegera muganga akagusuzuma akamenya icyo wakora ngo wongere uryoherwe n’imibonano.
7.Uko bikorwa
Aha bireba noneho umugabo kuko hari uburyo ashobora gukoramo imibonano umugore ntaryoherwe. Si uburyo gusa ahubwo n’ahantu, uko yateguye umugore, uko igitsina cye kingana ndetse n’isuku ye.
Ibi byose iyo bitari uko umugore ashaka ni byiza kubihindura, kandi bikaganirwaho mu bwisanzure. Niba umugore adakunda kubikora ahantu hasakuza, ubyubahirize. Yaba adakunda umugabo ufite insya, uzogoshe. Niba adakunda kumujya hejuru cyangwa kumwicaza, byose ubimenye.
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